12/22/2009 10:35:00 PM

The Young Sparrows

i found this blog on the internets:

The Young Sparrows

It sucks bad.

10/30/2009 05:09:00 PM

Totally awesome


And it really works! Try it yourself.

10/01/2009 04:25:00 PM

I finally get it

This is pretty dang funny.
(Warning: contains sometimes inappropriate language)

9/27/2009 10:15:00 AM

This is thanks to friend and follower Mitchell Wright. I think it will probably save all of your lives. Watch it, think about it.

8/17/2009 05:05:00 AM

Deseret News | Go west, Mr. President, to U.S. wilderness

Deseret News | Go west, Mr. President, to U.S. wilderness: "A day earlier at Yellowstone, the first family watched the world's most famous geyser erupt. 'Oh, that's pretty good. Cool! Look at that. That's a geyser there,' Obama said."

A fine quotation from our President; definitely newsworthy.

8/13/2009 07:50:00 PM

Pope Hats

"Because of this terrible economy, I'm having to shut down my business. I have OVER 1300 Pope hats (replicas) that I REALLY need to get rid of.

...

Dogs do not like to wear these pope hats, but maybe a large cat or maybe a nice dog would wear one. My dogs will not but they are not very nice and always hate being dressed up like for Halloween when we tried to dress them up like batman but they became very very agitated and bit a neighbors kid. I will lock the dogs up when you come get all of these pope hats."


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

8/09/2009 11:08:00 PM

Bless You, Leo Fender

A tribute to the man who defined electric guitars.

7/07/2009 02:51:00 PM

A Jane Austen Novel I Actually Wouldn't Mind Reading

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance - Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem!

From one review -

"For more than 50 years, we learn, England has been overrun by zombies, prompting people like the Bennets to send their daughters away to China for training in the art of deadly combat, and prompting others, like Lady Catherine de Bourgh, to employ armies of ninjas. Added to the familiar plot turns that bring Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy together is the fact that both are highly skilled killers, gleefully slaying zombies on the way to their happy ending."

Sweet.

7/07/2009 12:45:00 AM

A great site

I found this website with a large array of incredible products. Like the double-edge throwing axe. Or the solar powered hat. But this is probably my favorite. And this.

7/02/2009 11:00:00 PM

Sarychev Volcano Eruption

This is an incredible animation of the eruption. It's made out of 29 photographs taken from the International Space Station.

7/02/2009 05:09:00 PM

The Digital Ghetto that is MySpace

Danah Boyd, a social media researcher, believes that the rise of Facebook and the abandonment of MySpace "… was modern day ‘white flight’.”

She goes on to explain how sites like MySpace and Facebook are mirroring, even magnifying, our social, political and class divides.

Personally, I dislike MySpace because it breaks one of the cardinal commandments of the internet - "Music shall not begin playing of its own accord" - plus, it makes my eyes bleed.







I rest my case.

7/02/2009 02:56:00 PM

Gary Coleman's Wife was Arrested Today

Looks like she trashed his room and then said that he deserved it. Hmm...

7/02/2009 12:34:00 AM

The Real Reason That I'm Scared of Flying

This article exposes an egregious, underlying problem in America.

6/30/2009 07:48:00 PM

Starcraft Lessons from an Authentic Korean

At $35/hr for advanced training, this guys sounds pretty serious...

"I'm 100% full blooded Korean, meaning I have been gifted with unparallel talent to master any video game, particularly, Starcraft: Brood War.

...

My lessons are offered to only non-Koreans or American born Koreans because they lack the blessing from the Gaming God, Norazi. Sun Tzu once said, "Defiler becomes useless at the presences of a vessel." You will be come the vessel against the defilers that treats you like a non-korean, laughing at your pitiful Starcraft skills...however, you will demolish them with the new profound skills."

The best part? - "Korean girls will be intrigued that you're such a good Starcraft player."

6/26/2009 07:03:00 PM

I'm a few days behind so...

I'm certain I was the last to hear about this -
Evidently Iran is trying to hold off protests by airing a marathon showing of The Lord of the Rings trilogy on state television's Channel Two.

Sounds like a trap to me...

6/20/2009 03:24:00 PM

No More Cash in Japan?

Evidently some members of the Japanese government are considering getting rid of cash in order to achieve negative nominal interest rates.

"In theory, many Japanese could easily make the leap into a cashless world. The country has six main competing cashless payment systems, many of them embedded into mobile phones. Including Oyster-type cards issued by public transport companies, industry sources estimate that there are about 120 million cashless payment chips sitting in Japan’s wallets and handbags, waiting to be swiped."

6/18/2009 07:22:00 PM

0.01% of Wikipedia as a printed book

Yeah, this would be hilarious to put on a shelf. It's 1ft 7in. high.

6/18/2009 01:17:00 AM

PETA is completely ridiculous...

Apparently PETA isn't happy with President Obama and his fly-swatting ways.

Are these people serious?

6/17/2009 08:11:00 PM

Everything is only a few hundred clicks away!


Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard

6/15/2009 02:11:00 PM

Extreme Sheephearding

This is probably the coolest thing I've seen in a long time.

6/15/2009 12:57:00 AM

Graffiti from AD 79

Interestingly enough, Archaeologists have found plenty of well-preserved graffiti at Pompeii. This page lists the location and the approximate British translation of each of the inscriptions throughout the site. (Just like its modern day counterpart, ancient graffiti was primarily written by the dregs of society. Before you click the link, consider yourself warned.)


Here are a few of my tamer favorites for those I scared off -

VI.16.15 (atrium of the House of Pinarius); 6842: If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girl friend

VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1816: Epaphra, you are bald!

VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1820: Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!

VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1826: Phileros is a eunuch!

VIII.7.6 (Inn of the Muledrivers; left of the door); 4957: We have wet the bed, host. I confess we have done wrong. If you want to know why, there was no chamber pot

Herculaneum (on the exterior wall of a house); 10619: Apollinaris, the doctor of the emperor Titus, defecated well here

6/10/2009 05:20:00 PM

Strangest Thing I've Read Today...

From a 1972 Ensign article on the history of Provo -
"Provo played host as the fifty-sixth annual general conference of the Church was convened in the tabernacle there (April 4 to 7, 1886), and again for the fifty-seventh annual conference (April 6 to 8, 1887). Young boys among the worshipers climbed to the rough-finished portions of the building and hung over the rafters, enjoying a view of the speakers and listening to their counsel until their young innards hurt."

6/10/2009 02:10:00 PM

Conan + Mario

You may or may not have seen this already, but Conan O'Brien's new back drop reminds a lot of people of Mario... Check it.

5/18/2009 06:15:00 PM

My children will never watch this

... and neither should yours.



Fruit salad? What the...

5/17/2009 08:56:00 PM

JB in DC

This is an interesting article from the Washington Post details what happens when world renowned violinist Joshua Bell dressed down to play in a DC metro station.  

5/05/2009 02:58:00 PM

For people with absolutely no lives

This is a real class offered at Berkley that I hope will never make its way to BYU.

5/02/2009 02:06:00 PM

The weirdest thing that can ever happen to a caterpillar

Make sure you watch the whole thing - the last half is a mind trip, man...



P.S. I want one of those cameras!

4/24/2009 09:37:00 AM

Kim Jong Il's E-Library

I have enjoyed perusing the marvels of the DPRK's official web presence. Available is the E-library of the "Great Leader" himself. My favorite is the paper "ON THE INTENSIFICATION OF IDEOLOGICAL PROPAGANDA FOR A REVOLUTIONARY ADVANCE IN THE BUILDING OF THE ECONOMY AND STRENGTHENING OF OUR DEFENCE."

It's under the first Kim Jong Il folder.

KFA E-Library

4/21/2009 03:05:00 PM

Eastertime fun

The true nature of marshmallow creatures.

4/21/2009 07:17:00 AM

italy's great leader

Silvio Berlusconi makes third quake gaffe when he admires black priest's tan - Telegraph: "Silvio Berlusconi makes third quake gaffe when he admires black priest's tan"

4/13/2009 04:12:00 AM

HOLY INSANITY

This is the most insane person on the internet... wow...

4/09/2009 12:23:00 PM

How to Eat a Reese's According to LDS Church Leaders

10. Paul H. Dunn

I remember back in WWII that I ate a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. Back then, they were big enough to live on for a week. Being the only soldier to have survived the battle in my brigade, I really didn’t know If I could eat it or not, but I remember my fallen buddy’s words as he died in my arms: “Paul, if you just take one bite at a time you can tackle anything.” So I took that giant cup and, breaking it with the bat Babe Ruth gave me after I struck him out with two outs in the bottom of the ninth in the seventh game of the World Series, proceeded to wolf down the tiny morsels.

9. David B. Haight

Imagine 70 years ago on a rough road between Idaho and Logan. There were only Circle K’s, no 7-11’s. You had to bring your Peanut Butter Cups with you. Ruby and I split one for the first time in 1937.

8. Dallin H. Oaks

The Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup challenges us to consume. From the beginning there have been three steps in eating a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. First, remove the wrapper. This is best done quickly, by turning the cup over, grasping the outer fold and pulling away from the bottom. Second…

7. Joseph B. Wirthlin

When I was young I would sprint to the corner store, buy a Reese’s and run my hand through my hair before taking it down in one bite. These days I don’t sprint, and I have no hair, but the peanut butter cup remains.

6. Richard G. Scott

If you have not eaten a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, I plead with you. Eat one now. Enjoy the chocolate, the peanut butter. Do not delay. If you have thought, “That’s not for me,” I plead with you to reconsider. Of all foods I treasure, this one was the first.

5. M. Russell Ballard

The time has come when members of the church need to reach out to our friends and share a cup, a peanut butter cup. It is not enough to raise a chocolate bar, it must now have peanut butter.

4. Boyd K. Packer

In all my years, I have always eaten my Reese’sPeanut Butter Cups the same way—the established way we have been instructed to eat them. There is a far greater evil in this world, though—those who believe they can eat their cups in a way unconventional to the time-honored manner. We must be true and faithful and eat our Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups in the customary and recognized approach as it has heretofore been established.

3. Neal A. Maxwell

I intentionally initiate the delicious design of the deglutition of a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup by nibbling a negligible nit of the culinary creamy cavalcade. It is exclusively through small entities that the great things are fabricated.

2. Thomas S. Monson

I remember I ate my first Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup when I was a tender lad of eight. My mother came up to me, and with a loving twinkle in her eye, asked, ‘Tommy, are you eating a Reese’s?’

And I would invariably smile up to her, ‘Yes, yes, I am.’

‘But Tommy, did you know that Sister Jensen next door hasn’t eaten a Reese’s Cup in years?’ My young mind thought upon the plight of my neighbor. Tears were shed. Hearts were gladdened. A cup was shared.

1. J. Golden Kimball

Hell, Heber, I’ll eat a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup any damned way I want!

3/29/2009 02:38:00 AM

The Unloader

Watch my Junior Core Calendar get tarred and feathered

3/23/2009 10:02:00 PM

My Newest 100 Hour Board Question!

Dear 100 Hour Board,

With all the "Big Love" controversy recently, I have overhead numerous conversations regarding the temple endowment ceremony. I have repeatedly heard during these conversations that the Church has placed all of the ceremony in the Library of Congress. I've heard that the video is there and also that the script is there. I already know about the Reed Smoot hearings, but these people are all clearly stating that the Church placed it there. That would disqualify Smoot hearing stuff as well as apostate materials.

Most of the time people have said that it is because they have copyrighted the ceremony. The argument goes that to have a copyright you have to send it to the Library of Congress. I'm almost certain that legally that is not true. Regardless, I'd still like to know if the ceremony is there or not, because based on my research, this is a pretty pervasive belief. I'm endowed, so I have no reason to go to the LOC to look this stuff up. Rather, I would just really love to be able to definitively shut the rumor down (or substantiate it).

I searched the Library of Congress catalog as best I could, and found nothing. Looked in the 100 hour board archives and found nothing. Can you help me? Would the church have to put things in the LOC to copyright them? And is there any evidence that the Church actually put video or transcripts from the temple ceremony there?

- Person who loves to quash untrue LDS rumors

Click here for the answer

3/23/2009 01:03:00 AM

YouTube - A Dame A Dozen

YouTube - A Dame A Dozen:

3/16/2009 02:31:00 AM

So you saw Big Love, then Googled to find out more about this Mormon temple weirdness, and ended up here. | Times & Seasons, An Onymous Mormon Blog

So you saw Big Love, then Googled to find out more about this Mormon temple weirdness, and ended up here. | Times & Seasons, An Onymous Mormon Blog

Mormon temple

LDS Temple

Mormon Endowment

LDS Endowment Big love

3/15/2009 05:26:00 PM

Re-Creating the Mona Lisa in Burger Grease | A Hamburger Today

In Videos: Re-Creating the Mona Lisa in Burger Grease | A Hamburger Today

3/11/2009 06:12:00 AM

Worlds fattest cat

This gives Fat Cats a whole new meaning, er, I mean... brings back its original meaning: ""

3/11/2009 02:07:00 AM

Obama's First 50 Days?

CNN ran a rather thought-provoking poll recently. I think it's a trick question...

3/11/2009 02:00:00 AM

YouTube Remix

Do yourself a favor and check this out. This guy mixed random clips on YouTube together to form this awesome funk song!

Oh and just for the record, I think it's ridiculous when people say "do yourself a favor". Just plain ridiculous.

3/11/2009 01:52:00 AM

Velociraptor on a Hoverboard

“A velociraptor is coming at you on a hoverboard. In a haiku, describe how you will survive.”

This must be the greatest exam question ever!

3/09/2009 01:53:00 AM

Letter to Time Warner

Here is my email to Time Warner, parent company of HBO. Feel free to copy it (and include the shareholder part if you have any indirect financial interests in the company - that often takes a little research) -- I think Time Warner/HBO needs to receive a bleep-storm of letters from folks who disapprove. I don't want to attract undue attention to all this, but I'm definitely telling my LDS friends to notify Time Warner that we're not pleased.

It seems most likely, given the characters involved in the production of the show, that the whole thing is merely retaliation for the Church's involvement in Prop 8.


______________________________

To Time Warner Investor Relations:

I am a shareholder of Time Warner, Inc. via a mutual fund managed by Fidelity Management and Research, Inc.

I'm sure Time Warner is currently receiving quite a few emails from LDS folks as the viral emails circulate about the March 15 Big Love episode on HBO. I'm sure some are more well-reasoned than others and some more vitriolic than others. As a shareholder of HBO via Time Warner, I just hope that my message is read.

I am an active member of the LDS Church, and although I can only speak for myself, I think you can take my comments as fairly representative of the thoughts and feelings of many of your LDS shareholders. I recognize that HBO probably has every right to show parts of the LDS temple ceremonies on Big Love. I'm not (and neither has the church ever been) particularly fazed by the presence of information on the internet and elsewhere about the LDS temple endowment ceremony. I'm all for free speech and flow of accurate information. I applaud Time Warner for supporting journalistic and artistic integrity. I am generally pleased with Time Warner's business and the products and services it provides.

The problem with what HBO is doing now by producing this episode is that the airing of these sacred ceremonies is going to offend and upset Mormons worldwide by making this sacred part of our religion part of promoting a sitcom. You see, your sitcom isn't broadcast to educate people. It's purpose is to entertain. And the sacred things we do in the temple are not for entertainment or for creating shock value to increase viewership. The fact that some of the temple clothing was displayed in this week's "TV Guide Magazine" to promote your show is offensive to me and members everywhere. Major entertainment groups have produced entertaining pieces containing references to Mormonism for years, but all in the past 50 years (at least, as far as I know) all have had the respect to avoid graphic depiction of our sacred temple ceremonies. Even news reports aimed at education have respected the Church's request that these sacred things not be displayed outside of our temples for others to ridicule.

I expect people to poke fun at the Church or even to say that the Church is weird or nonsensical. I also expect a certain level of respect. The airing of these sacred rituals on a fictional program is the effectual "pantsing" of the LDS Church on television, and I don't think it's appropriate for a company of Time Warner's stature to participate.

You can be sure that I won't be participating in anything associated with Time Warner or any of its subsidiaries if this actually airs on March 15. I would appreciate it if you would refrain from holding those things that are sacred to me in front of your viewers for the benefit of your made-up television show, Big Love.

Sincerely,

Jordan Weber

3/05/2009 09:29:00 AM

Back when Church magazines published fiction

Maybe they still do, but i don't ever remember reading anything like THIS:
LDS.org - New Era Article - Last of the Big-Time Spenders

3/05/2009 02:51:00 AM

Oh. My. Gosh.

YouTube - Senior Adult Choir Hip Hop (Short Version)

I am completely dumbfounded. No words to describe.

3/05/2009 01:36:00 AM

Eating Out of a Toilet

From the article: "It's supposed to shock and confuse the senses," says Modern Toilet manager Chen Min-kuang.

The reasonably priced food includes curries, pasta, fried chicken and Mongolian hot pot, as well as elaborate shaved-ice desserts with names like "diarrhea with dried droppings" (chocolate), "bloody poop" (strawberry) and "green dysentery" (kiwi). Despite the disturbing descriptions, the desserts were great. But after seeing curry drip down a mini-toilet, I may never have that sauce again.

...That is freaking disgusting.

3/04/2009 09:23:00 PM

snuggies: taking the over world

Snuggie gets a warm embrace from pop culture - USATODAY.com

see also http://snuggiesightings.com/snuggie/

3/04/2009 03:16:00 AM

100th Post! Huzzah!

To celebrate, here are some pictures of urban camouflage.

The box suit cracks me up...

3/04/2009 03:07:00 AM

The Most Urgent 911 Call Ever



Hahahahahahahahaha! She say she are the manager!

3/03/2009 11:37:00 PM

Worst Christmas Song Ever

Someone sent me a link to www.mormonwebtv.com. I found this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oP3ngtRvYs

I warn you that I couldn't make it the whole way through the song - It's just that crappy. Just hearing this song, I think, would absolutely ruin the holidays.

2/27/2009 06:00:00 PM

Self Explanatory

Pull my finger. Now. Do it. Now. Do it now. Pull my finger.

2/27/2009 05:52:00 PM

Generate a Complaint

When you don't know what to say, but still want to complain, go here.

I intend on sending a 10 paragraph letter of complaint to Glenwood.

2/23/2009 02:21:00 PM

Neanderthal Music

Jazz composer Simon Thorne has been kind enough to let us know what Neanderthal music possibly sounded like.

If this is Neanderthal music, then I'm glad they aren't around to keep bothering us with it.

2/20/2009 04:26:00 PM

Proof The Fat Cats Sign Was Real

Jared & Sam: Only in Provo!!!

It's real!!!! I thought I had seen it that way, too. See also fetus evolution chart above linked blog post.

2/17/2009 05:45:00 PM

There Are Crazy People in Osaka

So according to this video, if you walk up to a random person in Osaka and pretend you're shooting them, they'll play along and pretend they've been shot. If I had only known this while I was on my mission...

2/17/2009 05:35:00 PM

25 Things I Hate About Facebook

I thought this was interesting... and kinda gay. But mostly just interesting and funny.

2/16/2009 03:28:00 PM

Monkeys take over city

Plague of monkeys | Video | Reuters.com

2/15/2009 08:17:00 PM

More love crap

So according to this article, there are "... three phases of love, which include lust, attraction and attachment. Lust is a hormone-driven phase where we experience desire. Blood flow to the pleasure center of the brain happens during the attraction phase, when we feel an overwhelming fixation with our partner. This behavior fades during the attachment phase, when the body develops a tolerance to the pleasure stimulants. Endorphins and hormones vasopressin and oxytocin also flood the body at this point creating an overall sense of well-being and security that is conducive to a lasting relationship."

Hmmm...

2/14/2009 10:25:00 AM

Kissing for Science, for reals

Kissing: It really is all about chemistry
| Reuters
: "Valentine Lotharios beware: There's a lot riding on a kiss, new studies on the science of smooching suggest.

Researchers said kissing sets off a complex set of chemical reactions, and in some cases, a bad kiss could be the kiss of death for a burgeoning romance.

'A kiss is a mechanism for mate assessment,' said Helen Fisher of Rutgers University in New Jersey, who is presenting her findings on Saturday at the American Association for the Advancement of Science meeting in Chicago.

Fisher, an anthropologist, told a news briefing that kissing is something more than 90 percent of human societies practice, but scientists are just beginning to understand the science of kissing, which is known as philematology."

2/13/2009 02:14:00 AM

Whoever made this should be shot


So I was looking around for some good ideas for dates and things to do around Provo when I realized something - the people who make these lists are complete imbeciles. I mean these people are so out of touch it's not even funny! (Even though it is...) These are the sorts of people who enjoy staring at blank walls in their apartments. Now, if we establish that as some sort of baseline for fun, then I suppose everything these people suggest is fun, if only marginally. For example, compared to staring at a blank wall, collecting canned food does sound like fun.

A few of the more ridiculous items I've run across include, but are not limited to:

-Reading Trip - Go to a bookstore, each pick an interesting book and read them to each other.
Ok, this could be fun if there were some element of danger involved. If one were to attempt to remove the books from the store and read them outside without paying for them, it would still not be interesting enough. This date idea can only be remedied by the addition of a potato gun. Load said gun with a book you hate and fire it in the bookstore. There, now it's fun! (Even better if you fire it AT an employee)

Fun level - 3.5 flaming chilies

-Kid Olympics - Put on an Olympics for little kids.
Completely ridiculous. This has pedophile written all over it. And how does this work? Do you round up all the neighborhood kids (In this case Helaman Halls?) and tell them to run races? I tried to do that all summer long and let me tell you, children do not like structured competition. You will have the kids that lost crying all over the place. Not fun. This could be fun if you gave them all paintbrushes and some 'oops' paint from Home Depot and told them to go paint their garage doors. Whoever paints the biggest dinosaur wins!

Fun level - Dino-mite!

-Clowns - Dress up like clowns and be in a parade.
This one makes me want to swear. How insulting is it when they think we'll buy this idea? Nothing more need be said.

Fun level - .1

-No Talking - Go on a date where neither of you can communicate verbally (this might not be too hard in some situations).
They are no longer content with merely insulting our intelligence with ridiculous suggestions. They are now literally trying to destroy relationships.

Fun level - Poor

-Kidnapping - Dress up like a robber and “kidnap” your date. Rush in with a group of friends stealing him or her away to some fun activity.
I've seen this one done before, and believe me, the girl always completely flips. It can take hours to calm her down. Wounds may result. But... it would be way fun if you rushed into the girl's room and fired a potato gun! Heck, we'll just leave the date at that.

Fun level - Matt, don't try this one

-Bow and Arrow - Go into the woods and get flexible sticks. Get bailing twine or some kind of strong small rope and make bows. Then have target practice with them.
Nothing says "I'm really cheap" like gathering sticks in the woods. Although I must admit, I remember doing this on family camping trips. I also remember it taking about 10 minutes before it got old. It would be fun if you actually killed something... Or started making out.

Fun level - 2 flaming lips

-Work Out - Do your muscles a favor and get some blood pumping through them.
If there is a date that says "I am a douche bag" it is this one.

Fun level - 45 Kg

-Poetry Reading - These can be a lot of fun, especially if you have a poem you can go up and read.
Hahahahahahaha!

Fun level - 1.5 split sides

-Meet the Grandparents - Double with your grandparents for dinner and play some fun date games with them.
Holy crap, I know who has been writing this list the whole time now! Grandparents should be introduced only AFTER you are married.

Fun level - ERROR

-Visit A Rest home - Visit some of the elderly at a nearby rest home it's a great way to hear some great stories.
Again, I'm fairly certain I know who wrote this entire list...

Fun level - N/A

-Dollar Date - Go on a date where you can’t spend more than a dollar. The possibilities are endless!
Keep in mind this list was written circa 1930. You could buy a house for a dollar. (Ok, I'm being a bit facetious. More like a car...) This could only be a fun date if you suddenly realized that it wasn't a one dollar bill but a $100 bill! And then you STILL only spent one dollar!

Fun level - $1.00

-Donate Blood - Donate blood at a local blood bank.
While we're at it, why don't we put down "Enlist with Selective Services"? This does not constitute a date.

Fun level - Approximately 1 pint

-Ring Shopping - Pretend like you are getting married and go shop for rings.
What the crap?

Fun level - What the crap?

-Bird Watching - Get a book at the library and then go bird watching.
No. Unless it's part of a picnic or something else. But even then... no.

Fun level - Self-inflicted head wound

-Drawing/Painting - Paint or draw a portrait of each other.
All I can think of is Napoleon Dynamite...

Fun level - 1 shaded upper-lip

-Historic Cemetery - Visit the cemetery in downtown Salt Lake where a number of prominent LDS leaders are buried.
Weird. I'd do this, but not for a date...

Fun level - Porter Rockwell. Or maybe J. Golden Kimball.

-Garage Sale/Ebay Date - Go garage sale hopping and try to find the best deals then sell them on Ebay. Use the money you make on your next date.
This one is hilarious, because you might end up losing money and out on a second date.

Fun level - POSITIVE: Fast payment A+++++++++!!!!!!

2/04/2009 10:17:00 PM

The Birds and the Bees

I never understood what that phrase meant until I read this article.

1/29/2009 01:44:00 AM

Devolve Me

So at this site you can upload a picture of yourself and see what you would look like devolved into a Homo heidelbergensis, Homo erectus, or even a Homo habilis. Sweet.

1/28/2009 11:39:00 PM

myriad - Definition from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary

myriad - Definition from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary: "usage Recent criticism of the use of myriad as a noun, both in the plural form myriads and in the phrase a myriad of, seems to reflect a mistaken belief that the word was originally and is still properly only an adjective. As the entries here show, however, the noun is in fact the older form, dating to the 16th century. The noun myriad has appeared in the works of such writers as Milton (plural myriads) and Thoreau (a myriad of), and it continues to occur frequently in reputable English. There is no reason to avoid it."

Huhah!!! and they told me I couldn't use it like that.

1/26/2009 09:13:00 PM

PS - who plays video games like this?



Ridiculous. That guy is obviously in complete darkness. Shouldn't you at least turn your TV on if you're going to play some video games? No wonder they found a bunch of losers in their study.

Look at the other photos from the press release here

1/26/2009 09:06:00 PM

IF YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES, YOU'RE A LOSER

BYU News - Release

'The research is based on information collected from 813 college students around the country. As the amount of time playing video games went up, the quality of relationships with peers and parents went down.

“It may be that young adults remove themselves from important social settings to play video games, or that people who already struggle with relationships are trying to find other ways to spend their time,” Walker said. “My guess is that it’s some of both and becomes circular.” '


I, on the other hand, have done my own scientific research (faculty mentor: kiefer sutherland), and have found a direct increase in the quality of my relationships as a result of video game usage. In fact, some of my best memories in the past 18 months of being back from my mission have been playing video games. And I normally get more dates when I play video games, too. I keep asking myself, "Why haven't I been doing this more often?" and "How can I increase my video game playing?"

The bogusness of this study is further proven through the following paragraph:
“Relationship quality is one of a cluster of things that we found to be modestly associated with video games,” Walker said. “The most striking part is that everything we found clustered around video game use is negative.”

You see, even without my improved relationships, I can still identify several positive things from video game use. For example, if you came at me with a trench gun and the juggernaut perk enabled, I would know to knife you in the neck instead of trying to get you by shooting you 25 times with the M1A1 Carbine. If that's not positive, I don't know what is. I mean, I've got skills like knowing when to throw a flash bang and how to use an aperture scope.

Not to mention the keen sense I have of people sneaking up behind me. Just think of all those people who get killed by lurkers in alleyways - I bet THEY wished they had played a little more video games! That's a negative effect of NOT playing video games. But they're not included in this study because THEY'RE DEAD!!!

Besides, I think it's pretty obvious from the website that the faculty mentor just did the research paper because she wanted to hook up with the undergrad.

1/23/2009 03:44:00 PM

A day in the life of Jeff




1/23/2009 03:35:00 PM

Sheep go to heaven, goats go to . . .

The Bible is quite clear on where goats stand in God's eyes. This may be why some particularly percipient Nigerians decided to take action. Whatever the reason, we are at least spared one more robber-goat.

1/20/2009 06:30:00 PM

The Deadliest iPod Ever


I plan on making extensive use of this.

1/18/2009 12:07:00 PM

animal testing

US Airways Jet Lifted From Hudson - WSJ.com: "According to material posted on the FAA's Web site, the type of engines on the US Airways jet were certified to be able to keep operating for five minutes at 75% of normal takeoff power after ingesting a total of five birds, each weighing 1.5 pounds. If a single bird weighing four pounds gets sucked into an engine, FAA standards require it to be able to shut down safely, without a fire or internal disintegration."

It might have been interesting to have been on the team to figure that out.

1/15/2009 09:05:00 PM

The Next Wave

These Japanese monkeys think they're human. I can vouch for their humanity. They tried to take my wallet once in Kyoto to buy a pair of shoes.